I’ve been blogging somewhat sporadically the last few weeks. Gone is my focus, my routine and my schedule. It’s less to do with the fact that we have a five week old baby and more to do with that fact that a little over two weeks ago I accepted the fact that I was suffering from either anxiety or Postnatal Depression. D was only two weeks old and it had hit me hard. In the beginning I questioned whether it was the baby blues as the pregnancy hormones began to leave my body and sent me into a spiral. But now that I am five weeks postpartum and I’m still experiencing the painful pang of what feels like depression mixed with anxiety and confusion, I realise that I need help. I was nervous about publishing this post because it’s incredibly personal, probably the most personal I’ve written on the blog as it leaves me somewhat vulnerable, but if even one person relates to this post and realises that they too are suffering which then leads them to get help, then this post has been worth publishing.
I haven’t been a very good blogger lately for a number of reasons which I suppose I can, hopefully, be forgiven for. Firstly at 33 weeks pregnant… or is it 34? I’ve lost count!.. I’m exhausted and am finding it very difficult to stay up past 10pm most nights. Hell, 10pm! I’m doing quite well there. Secondly, I’m tired of complaining, so I imagine you’re tired of listening to me complain. Considering all I could think to write about was once again my hatred of pregnancy, I’ve refrained from writing a blog post until now. Thirdly, I was on doctors orders to relax more and give the blog a back seat, so blogging once a week has pretty much been my limit. I had intended on taking a break from writing completely this week and leave you all wondering where I was until B sent me an email that triggered a ton of emotions.
This week on In Conversation With, Heather joins us. Heather writes an aptly named blog Very Anxious Mommy. I think it’s safe to say that we all go through moments of anxiety as we try to figure out how to be the best parent we can be and also cope with the usual disasters life can throw at us. Heather, is mum to two beautiful children, an advocate for breastfeeding and a stay at home mum. She is also open and honest in her blog about battling anxiety and depression and is genuinely an inspiration to all of us. Remember to check out her blog and to follow her on social media.
I like to think I’m prepared. Ready for anything that might come my way. I can fix it, make it better. All will be OK because I AM PREPARED. I feel like a walking textbook of DIY and home hacks. I should have a Lycra jumpsuit with a thunderbolt across the chest saying I Can Do It.