The phrase “having it all” did not necessarily begin as being strictly implied for the professional mother but somehow, over the years, we have found our way here. Career driven women who inevitably question the balance of life with work and motherhood. Making choices as though it’s a necessity to choose. Or attempting to balance the load of success in every aspect of our lives because we are the great acrobats of modern society. Because being successful is how we are supposed to measure these things, right?
We question those choices. And argue about why we can’t have it all. We debate the very idea of what it means and why we want it, searching under rocks and digging on every X. Feeling the pressure of guilt, self-doubt and judgement on every scale as it balances out of our favour. We battle an ever, omnipresent idea of being bigger, better and more than we are. As though striving to reach goals, break through glass ceilings and chase our dreams becomes a questionable commodity as motherhood calls. Almost as though we search in vain.
This week on In Conversation With, I had the pleasure of speaking with the beautiful Julie from Fab Working Mom Life. Julie is a working Mom, a blogger and a mother of one. I know exactly the daily grind Julie goes through as I’m a full time working Momma Bear also. It can be very difficult to keep the house and home going and ensure you’re not neglecting yourself, your partner and most importantly your children. But some how we manage it, and sometimes we need help. Julie’s blog is fantastic and I feel like I can relate to a lot that she says. Keeping our identity in parenthood is so important. Read on to see what Julie has to say on being a working mom.
A year ago, a former Google Executive, Ellen Petry Leanse, wrote a piece on LinkedIn advising women to avoid using the word “just.” When I read Leanse’ article, I admit I initially felt a tinge of feminism wash over me. The words Woman and Permission and Passive jumped out from the screen with a hand ready for a slap and I instantly took offence. I am by no means a feminist, but I will advocate for women’s rights if it is something I believe strongly in – Repeal the 8th – and stand up for my beliefs as regards to women in society. It’s not something you can run away from being a woman and a mother raising a strong and determined daughter. Leanse’ opinion on women’s overuse of such a simple word started to make sense to me the more I looked at how often I actually included it in my daily life. I’m just saying…
Yesterday morning was one of our BLITZ mornings. Everything had to be done at hyper speed because we let the alarm clock go to snooze too many times. Ok so I’m in charge of the alarm clock and the BLITZ was entirely my fault and I felt and looked the stress of it. On days like this I often think of the working mum I see on the bus on the way to work. Does she struggle on mornings like this too?
I am delighted to include an In Conversation With series on the blog with some lovely Momma’s and Papa’s who would like to share their tips, tricks and ideas on gaining that understated balance on parenting life. As a full time working Mom and Dad, B and I are often trying to find the correct balance with our careers and our home life. It’s never easy to know if you’re doing the right thing by your children or your partner and as always parenting guilt can take over. It takes a while to get into a routine with work and babies but oddly you do find that routine and manage some sort of equilibrium that suits your family. For me the balance comes with getting quality time with A. This week I speak to a stay at home mother who has raised her two children in the rural countryside of Co. Meath.
Frick, I’m tired! No Exhausted! This morning was one of those “Dear God, no, I can’t get out of bed” mornings. Now that A is two and a half, I don’t feel like I actually have the right to tell the world just how exhausted I am. Gone are the night feeds, the sleepless nights, the 4am wakings with a baby who is ready for the day. And it was repetitive as any parent knows. Its not just a week or a month. Oh no that broken, almost lack of sleep lasts a looooooooooonnnnngg time.
B and I are both working parents. I love my job. B is “so, so” on his but he’s damn good at what he does. But it sucks. Whether, you work part time, full time, work from home with 1 kid, 2 kids or 6, it’s hard. The balance is torturous to try and get right. Parenting is difficult no matter what way you do it, whether you work or stay at home. There doesn’t seem to be a perfect balance, so we try to make the best of it. Returning to work after maternity leave was difficult. Here are my tips on returning to work to help make the transition smoother.